My father’s birthday is this coming Sunday. He’ll be 81 years old. Bo Gia (“Boe Zaah,†Old Daddy in Vietnamese) has been through much in his life, having been forced to migrate repeatedly and weather Vietnam’s turbulent history through the 20th century.
As a young man, he pondered becoming a priest but went into the military instead, taking on the role of provincial governor by the time he was in his late 20s. After the Diem assassination in 1963, Bo Gia switched careers to become a business development consultant (today’s equivalent of a start-up pro). My dad had always wanted to study and live in the United States; in his youth, he even applied for a scholarship abroad. In the end, it was the Fall of Saigon in 1975 that brought him and our family here.
If you asked Bo Gia about his eventual good fortune of living in America, he’d respond that it was mostly because of his religious conviction. My dad attends mass every morning at his local Catholic church. He can lead a rosary in Vietnamese – which resembles a light chant – like no one else can in our clan. Religious statues are displayed in various prominent spots at my parents’ home.
My dad’s devotion to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit is combined with his belief in three material things that have helped him get out of many tough jams: tiger balm, eucalyptus oil, and toothpicks. Those are his fix-it tools. Seriously.
We couldn’t take much with us when we fled Vietnam but he tucked small containers of tiger balm and eucalyptus oil into our hand-held luggage. He figured that if any of us got sick, the ointment and oil would save us. Got a cold or other afflictions caused by too much wind in your system? Dad brought out a silver dollar and the tiger balm to cao gio – scrape the wind out of our bodies.
A traditional Chinese medicine technique that’s popular in Southeast Asia, the Tiger Balm coining was done more or less to follow the rib bones. The result was a post-modern pattern of slanted red lines on our backs. It was painful but healing. (Physiological details on cao gio are at this site.)
The eucalyptus oil was Dad’s go-to remedy. He inhaled it from the bottle to relieve congestion, soaked a paper towel with it and made me wear it to school if I had a cold, rubbed it on his temples to alleviate headaches. I once suffered a seizure and he revived me with eucalyptus oil. He believed in the power of eucalyptus oil to cure us many (if not all) ills.
After we arrived in the US, he was delighted to find eucalyptus oil at the pharmacy; he wanted our family to run a pharmacy at one point too. To this day, dad keeps a sizeable 16-ounce bottle of the oil on hand (the 2-ounce one in the photo is mine). His house has a pleasant spa-like aroma from it. Eucalyptus oil is Dad’s aromatherapy.
In a MacGyver-like manner, Bo Gia often reached for toothpicks. I remember him using one to fix a pair of glasses. He employed toothpicks to apply minute bits of glue to things. When our family decorated Christmas Yule logs (Buche de Noel), my dad used toothpicks to carve out extra real, barklike details on the frosting. The delicate air vents in my mom’s moon cakes asre made with toothpicks. Bo Gia prefers cheap flat toothpicks for their great versatility and over pricier round ones, which are harder to manipulate.
My father has navigated a life full of uncertainties. While his religious beliefs serve as a ballast, so do several old school tools. The 81-year-old lesson here that maintaining your convictions is important. Happy Birthday, Bo Gia!
P.S. Novelist Monique Truong told me on Facebook that her holy trinity of Vietnamese condiments included fish sauce, soy sauce, and Maggi. I suppose that my holy trinity of ingredients is fish sauce, rice, and salt. What 3 ingredients or things do you rely on?
More posts on my dad:
Tuty says
Please convey my best birthday wishes to your dad and I admire his devotion to the Virgin Mary. What a lovely post, Andrea.
I had to laugh when you mention about "cao gio"... I suppose this must be a common remedy throughout South East Asia. In Indonesia, it is called KEROK which translates as scraping. We treasure those smooth edge coins because the ones with the ridges can be used as a torture device 😉 Did you have a rub down with eucalyptus oil after the "cao gio"?
Diane says
Lovely post! Many happy returns to your Dad.
Biki Honko says
Happy birthday to your wonderful papa.
Our family trinity is: garlic, ginger and chilies.
Andrea Nguyen says
Tuty: Glad you got a kick out of the cao gio. Yep, Indonesian kerok and Viet cao gio are the same! Both are based on Chinese gua sha.
No, we didn't get a post-scraping rub down with eucalyptus oil. The Tiger Balm was enough...
Andrea Nguyen says
Thanks, Diane and Biki! My dad reads the posts on VWK and will appreciate your warm wishes.
RobynNZ says
Happy Birthday Andrea's Dad.
I came on to say you have 'saved' me this evening. I was doing a practise run making a Christmas tree from star shaped gingerbread. All the layers are glued with icing, but the final star is placed vertically. In the photo it appears to be held up by the icing and there are no special instructions in the method. But no way was it going to stand upright, I need it to be supported til the icing dried. Suddenly I thought of your answer to such a problem - toothpick to the rescue. It worked, thank you.
Hope you have a very happy day, celebrating the passage of another year.
Robyn
Andrea Nguyen says
RobynNZ: OMG -- toothpicks saved you! LOVE it. Welcome to the toothpick club. Happy holidays. 🙂
Yun Ho Rhee says
Hi Andrea:
Please convey my belated best wishes to your dad on his birthday. Tiger Balm...we too have it in our medicine cabinet. I still like the yellow one over the white one even though the yellow one can leave some stain on your skin. Roasted rice powder, rock sugar and Maggi (fish sauce is now abundantly available in Korea)
Cheers!
rick tippie says
i must be the old fat whiteboy version of your dad. i buy the tigerbalm in the large tin. it really makes my arthiritus vanish. i also like the eucalptis oil in a hot bath tub and in a sinus steam with a towel over my head on the stove. as for tooth picks , i use them for making screws fit back into holes on my old 1930's house when i fix something. most of the time when i replace something in the old wood it's been done many times before. breaking a wooden toothpick and putting a few pieces in the hole before putting it back together makes the screw go in snug and tight.
living in new orleans i allways thought of the holy trinity in the kitchen as onion, celery, and bell pepper. cool to see other takes on the same idea i.e. the holy trinity meaning something else outside of the church. thank you for this post.
aromatherapy oils says
It sounds like you love your dad very much. He seemed like a great, noble father to you. I am also a fan of eucalyptus oils. Its my very own version of aromatherapy oils.
ear candles says
I am so sorry for your loss. Eucalyptus oils are an effective therapy especially if you are suffering from back aches or muscle soreness. You can use it as aroma therapy or apply it directly.
[email protected] says
Why do you think that way?
But is well written. Pay attention to you. By yzi10 good luck!
marlon says
It sounds like you love your dad very much. He seemed like a great, noble father to you.
Nickle says
Nice blog.. i appreciated it 🙂
essay term paper says
A toothpick is a small stick of wood, plastic, bamboo, metal, bone or other substance used to remove detritus from the teeth, usually after a meal. A toothpick usually has one or two sharp ends to insert between teeth. They can be used for picking up small appetizers or as a cocktail stick. Thanks.
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